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Ok! Here it goes! I'll try to be short as I don't want to take your time up. You're so thoughtful to even listen, thank you.

I grew up in CA with a Mum who has given her life to the welfare of others. I saw a lot about the process of the elderly dying within her work..and used to meet a lot of Holocaust survivors and see people dying, who swore their long deceased relatives were there during the process. So I grew up with some faith, but rebelled in my 20's. I used to party, drink, try some recreational drugs etc...and was very angry about my parents divorce.

I've changed a lot over the years, and live quite a good life. I travel the world, have a beautiful 13 year old, write childrens books and always felt somehow, someway I had a strong purpose in the world. But, I never read the bible or felt religious enough to pray everyday..although I'm one of the odd individuals who, more often than not, have a huge empathy for my fellow human beings and have been known to give my shoes to someone who needs them, hug a vagrant and feed-clothe him(sometimes I think people like this are angels and I always thank them for allowing me to do something good...), buy xmas presents for those who need them and give my last dollar when I don't have anything myself. This is just me..and in my heart I've always been this way....I'd even rescue a baby fox, squirrel, any living thing. But lately, I'd say the past 2 or 3 years, I've been drawn to stories like yours...and suddenly have strong desires to read the bible, investigate the possibility of an afterlife and God...and its been growing tremendously in the last year.

During all the lead up years to what I call a possible 'spiritual awakening', I went back to school and got an MA in Holocaust studies (I quit high school at 14 but got in a program at Southampton University due to my knowledge on the subject in the UK) and have strong desires to help the peace process in Israel-Gaza and elsewhere. I even went to Israel!It just seems like I'm supposed to do something to spread love and peace..like my past problems were all because I needed them to build empathy and strength. I can't explain this feeling...its just there within me. Well...the 'dream' I'm talking about was about 4 weeks ago and I'm serious when I say..it was nothing like a dream...and I'm still trying to move on from it..but its staying with me. I think about it everyday. I was standing in a long hallway next to a door. I saw everything as if I was looking at this environment from my eyes ie I didn't see myself from a distance, etc.. The other end was lit up very brightly and the sky was sooo light blue and beautiful. No clouds, just a beautiful stillness....What's striking about this is the atmosphere...it was crystal clear with an almost humming or buzzing sound...how do I describe this!?! So quiet it had a sound of buzzing...and the view was brilliant in its 'clarity'...it looked so real I thought I was awake but it was MORE real than what we see here. I could see at the end of the hall a beautiful sky...

Here's where it got scary! I didn't see a thing in this hallway or sky or door that was alive in a physical sense...I just somehow 'knew' something very evil was approaching me. How do I find the words to describe this!?! It was like a sudden feeling of absolute fear and dread...and I knew it was coming and I was absolutely terrified. The word terrified isn't able to accurately describe this...but its the only word I can find to get closer to any kind of description! I remember it started getting darker, and suddenly I felt this heaviness surround me...almost like walls from every direction squeezing the life out of me...crushing me. Here's the strangest bit...! I dropped to my knee's and started saying the Lords prayer. It was so deeply passionate and I can't say I've ever prayed like this...EVER. But where in my mind or heart this came from is beyond me! I simply can't make sense of it....I just knew from somewhere in my mind I had to pray! Anyway, I said the lords prayer over and over and over whilst being crushed and my throat began to choke.

There was nothing doing this that I could see...just an unknown source of horrible energy crushing me slowly. Also, my hands were being pulled apart...but I kept putting them back together to pray. I didn't see a thing! No demons, no person, it was just some invisible force...trying to crush or choke me...and although it wasn't said, I knew it was telling me to stop praying in the most violent way...without words...I just knew what this terrible evil wanted me to do. Well, after praying the Lords prayer several times and severely choking and unable to breathe, this evil weight started to lift. I suddenly could breathe easier and soon after the weight lifted and I knew it was gone. The peace and light that followed is beyond anything I've ever felt....the silence brought a loving, peaceful feeling I've never known. So still its beyond words but so beautiful. I knew I was safe. When I awoke, I felt like I'd been through the fight of my life! Exhausted and so scared...I felt this was real and I was filled with fear.

I questioned what this experience was and where I'd been. I couldn't sleep for a while and was quite frightened...so scared I found my cross and laid it at my bedside with a bible I had in a drawer. The next night confirmed it was real because it was a continuation of the night before...as I had another dream, except this one was solely seeing my hands...which were terribly bruised, discoloured and abused. That's it. I just saw the damage to my hands. Well, since then I've been worried about this. I've had hundreds of dreams in the past, but NOTHING that has come close to this. I even thought at one point I died in my sleep. I also thought maybe there was evil trying to stop my spiritual growth and it doesn't want me to get closer to God!? I don't know...I have no way of truly understanding this. But it now keeps me awake sometimes. So...what do you make of this? Am I going crazy? Have you ever heard anything like this before? Love, Julia

{edit by Misha: added some line breaks for readability}
Hi Julia!

It seems you had a really scary experience. I had one too.

These things can be so upsetting. I hope it has stopped.
Thank you Misha! I'm not happy it also happened to you but feel a bit better knowing I'm not alone. How do you understand this? Could it have been real? Love, Jules
Also, What was yours about?
It was about 20 years ago. I was in bed, probably falling asleep or waking up. I suddenly felt a horrible horrble energy in the room, like pure evil. I couldn't move. With horror the thing got right on top of me, like "it" was sitting on my chest. I couldn't move my mouth, or even any muscle for that matter. I repeated mentally a few times, "get out of here in the name of _____." (a well-known ascended master)

As far as what words I said, that's kind of personal, and I wouldn't be representing NDERF correctly if a said a whole bunch of personal stuff. Now, I probably do something similar, but with different words. People address Source and Power in ways they understand based on their training, experiences and intuition.

Psychologists probably would call this sleep paralysis, hypnogic paralysis, or old hag syndrome, but to me, at least, it seemed like a real spiritual event outside of myself.

Sometimes, I think back on that day and wonder if I really experienced evil. The feeling was pretty unforgettable. I also had some nightmares as a kid. The feeling was very similar, but I was an adult.
Siento que Kelly 82 (la autora de esa ECM en esta web), puede ayudarte al respecto, tuvo un ECM que me hace recordar a tu sueño (aunque no se parecen)

I feel that Kelly 82 (the author of that NDE in this web), she can help you in this regard, she had an NDE that reminds me your dream (although it's do not look).
Sorry for my english
Hi Julia,

I'm sorry that you have had to deal with these bad dreams.
About 18 years ago I also had some very scary dream like experiences similar to yours. They seemed to happen in a row, within a a couple of weeks of time and then they went away, and have not had any more since. I did some research and found out that my experiences fit the description of what is called "sleep paralysis". I was waking up during the night but unable to move or even open my eyes and yet I could see my room and everything around me as it was, I was trying to get my husband to wake me up but could not move or talk, almost as if my spirit was awake but my body wasn't. It was very strange and scary. I saw three hooded entities standing to my right side of the bed and I was petrified. They were just standing there,it seemed that they were watching me but I could not see their faces because of their hoods
I finally was able to get my body to wake up, and everything was just as I saw it without being physically awake. The entities were gone.
I did find that reaching out to God and praying helped me. I also read that these experiences are more common than we think.
What I read about sleep paralysis, is that you have power, control and the ability over whatever evil energies you perceive by pushing them and ordering them to go away, and that when you do, they go away.

Natalie
I have always been told that if you ask evil to go away in the name of Christ and tell the evil that you belong to Christ that is must leave you alone. Always seems to work for me.
Hello, I agree! I've prayed about this and to Christ and guess what? No more dreams....although I know this wasn't a dream. Its similar to all NDE'rs...they know 100% that their experience was real. I know this was real too and the timing perfect as ivbeen growing spiritually more than ever ...a huge turning point in my life and very significant. I thank you for your feedback and so needed it....God bless you! Jules

Ps...I truly believe that the idea of sleep paralysis is an attempt to explain scientifically what this is...similar to those who try to associate NDE'rs with hallucinations wilst dying. This 'attack' was just too perfectly timed almost as an attempt to stop the process of myself turning to God. This evil did this as a last resort...
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