Find your purpose and increase positivity

[Giulia]

A very interesting post, Tony.

Ever since I researched, understood and started implementing the Law of Attraction, I realised that it is my choice whether to have a negative o positive bias. My essence usually leads me to an optimistic approach. This enables me to clarify my missions and be laser-focused on my purpose.

[Carys]

Thank you for this post, Anthony. I struggled with what Rashmir describes as 'negativity bias' for many years and realised eventually that for almost every affirmation I did, I engaged in a whole lot more negative thinking that undermined it. There were often also unconscious attitudes, or emotional reactions that seemed to bypass any thinking that I was aware of, so affirmations and positive thinking didn't make a dint in those things until I learnt how to ferret out what was behind the attitudes and automatic reactions. Basically, I just had to ask myself, "Why am I reacting like this?" or "Why am I not responding to this?" and follow my nose.

My unconscious mind always knew the reason why and usually gave it to me straight away - almost always something to do with childhood experiences or life choices that had become automatic over time. Sometimes it seemed like I was either scared of finding out the answer or I was too wedded to values or ideas I had so the answer didn't come straight away. If that was the case, I'd have a dream about it later on, or some situation would arise that was connected to what I was questioning and it would prompt me to think about the question I'd asked myself. Other times I would dismiss my first thought as either not making sense or being too simple, which basically had the effect of shutting myself up. Over time, though, I learnt to listen to everything that came up and if it didn't make sense, I asked myself more questions until I got a bigger picture or I just sat with whatever the first response was and let it evolve over a few days.

It makes sense that negativity bias works for humans as a survival mechanism. I think knowing that helps us to be gentle and patient with ourselves and where we are on our path. I think it also makes it easier to understand how people with many traumas find it hard to undo the thinking, habits or addictions that helped them to survive their past, and sometimes their present too bc family issues are often at the heart of anxiety and trauma. And some traumatising family issues come up long before we have the language to describe it. So the path of changing negativity can be long and strewn with obstacles. It can feel like safety - negotiating that when the circumstances still exist in some degree is tricky and requires a lot of self patience.

There's a song from the late 1980s by The Indigo Girls called 'Closer To Fine'. One verse in it really helped me to notice when I was repeating negative beliefs and I began to sing it in order to turn a negative thinking spiral around. It's amazing how music can redirect thinking. I find I don't need it these days but for a while there, I couldn't seem to stop some types of thinking without it. It pretty much sums up the negativity bias that Rasmir described:

"Well the darkness has a hunger that's insatiable,
And the lightness has a call that's hard to hear.
I wrapped my fear around me like a blanket,
I sailed my ship of safety 'til I sank it,
I'm crawlin' on your shore."

[Giulia]

Hello, again, Tony. I am sorry I offered a very short reply the other day.

You said:

I met Rashmir on Twitter. She helps me to focus and learn new ideas. And she has chatted with me many times.

I am very glad you have found relief and support from this person.

I have mixed feelings about the term "negative bias". I remember having a blissful life until the age of six. When I started going to school I suddenly started feeling sad. It happened overnight. Since then, I have done everything in my power to reconnect with my young self, and, as I worked on this, I came to the conclusion that the "negative bias" is a manmade thing.

I quite imagine how harder it must have been for you, having had an NDE at the age of 7 and getting that sort of reaction from the adults in your life. I get that reaction as well about the most sacred experiences I have.

[Giulia]

Hello, Tony Why don’t you post your ADC experiences in the ADC forum rather than simply posting a link? In this way members are more likely to read and comment about them.